Archive for the ‘Editorial/Advice’ Category

Please Welcome TEAVANA To The Shopping List!

Hey readers! I wanted to let you all know that the newest retailer I have hooked up with is Teavana. Excellent purveyors of a wide variety of teas and tea-related gifts, their teas are made from only the highest grade teas from around the world and our unique tea blends please tea connoisseurs, gourmets, and non-discerning men and women. With over 100 healthy and delicious teas, including white and green tea, oolong, diet teas and more, Teavana has something for everyone!


Teavana sells much more than just tea, our exclusive teapots and accessories make great gifts! From handmade cast iron teapots to fine bone china tea sets, Teavana has stylish and functional products to make tea. Tea gifts are especially popular for holidays like Valentines Day, Mothers Day, and Christmas.

Please click on any of the links below to visit Teavana, and start drinking healthier today. I do get a commission off all sales through my links, so thanks again for the support!

Teavana Heavenly Sale

Teavana Sale & Clearance

Tea Gifts

Teavana Oolong Teas

It’s The Little Things

I am tired tonight, so this may be brief, but wanted to get it posted while it is fresh on my brain.

One thing of which I have become keenly aware in parenthood are all the little noises that make up the constant din of life. Particularly noticeable are those noises that occur at night, especially here in a multi-unit condo building a javelin’s throw from the heart of downtown Chicago (I’ve tried throwing a stone across the river, but it can’t be done, at least not by my 38 year old blown-out arm). This is because of how much I have learned to value a full uninterrupted night of sleep, and the rarity at which it occurs for me. By the way, from my wife’s point of view, every word in this post should be in ALL CAPS and bold print as she takes the brunt of the nighttime disturbances.

Among the noises that grate on me are the horrible and demanding moan of the cat. Who ever thought keeping a nocturnal animal as a pet was a good idea never lived with two kids in a downtown loft…I can assure you of that. Before the children, I wouldn’t even have known Jack was here save for the cat-hair-bunnies in the corners of the room, but once the kids arrived, the 3 o’clock hour brings a nightly chorus of demands that must be met with the opening of a Fancy Feast for them to end! I am a whisker away from gathering what’s left of his food along with a can opener in a bandanna, tying it to a stick, and sending him packing…and if any of you PETA folk have an issue with that, by all means, offer up your own loving home.

Another recurring cacophony is the late night (and please understand that “late” for us these days is after 9:00 pm) ambling of the neighbors above us. Please note that I have an acute understanding of how loud we are through most of the daylight hours, so do not blame the folks upstairs, but it is what it is. This is a brick and timber loft building and virtually every unit has beautiful hardwood floors cushioned here and there with area rugs. Well, when lying in bed, those high heeled shoes trotting across the ceiling/floor might as well be poking directly through my eardrum, and worse, the eardrum of my suddenly sensitive little boy. Yes, Xavier has entered his inquisitive phase for lack of a better term, and wants to know the origin and meaning of every drip, scrape, clank, and creak made once he lies down to sleep. Once he is awakened, it becomes a game of 20 questions before I can head back to the warmth of my own bed.

Finally, and by no means is this even close to an exhaustive list, there is the “man-sized” rocking recliner that I purchased for Kerry about a year and a half ago to replace the even more nauseating squeaky wooden rocker passed down from her grandmother. Oh, that old rocker was going to be the end of my sanity altogether, so we headed out to find a suitable replacement upon which Kerry rests with the babies, first Xavier, and now Hayden. The chair is a vital piece of furniture, but as I stated above, we live in a loft condo with very high ceilings, no complete walls, and hardwood floors. For a while, the new chair was a dream. It brought comfort, quiet, and peaceful sleep, but then things began to change.

The Beast

The Beast

A squeak began to develop, and grew steadily until it became almost as bad as the replaced rocker. The darn thing is also elusive, and no amount of WD-40 can quiet the beast. I considered rubbing bacon grease on all the joints before Kerry calmly reminded me that it might attract bugs…right, that though it might smell nice, would not be a desirable solution. The problem is, that as I said, the chair is vital to our nighttime rituals, so the squeaks continue, and with each one, the nerves fray a bit more, and the temptation to toss it over the balcony become all so appealing.

Because we are in a seemingly eternal showing cycle as we continue to try to sell our home, we can not afford a net addition to the “staged” environment. This means, of course, that the recliner too now must find a new home. So up for sale it goes. Still to be determined is whether it goes on craigslist.com or on e-Bay, but either way, it must begone. Oh, give it a carpeted floor upon which to rest, and it will be a good quiet-er friend for years to come. With soft microfiber, and a surprising amount of lumbar support, it is one of the most comfortable chairs I have ever slept in, and have completed many a night doing just that. Alas, this is not that home. With any luck, we will get an offer on our house before we unload the chair, but that would seem unlikely, and the beast will have to go, only to be replaced with a smaller and more nimble cousin from the glider family. And if any of you are interested, and live in Chicago, please let us know…perhaps we’ll throw in a medium sized good-natured black cat as a bonus!

So, as I type as quietly as I can to avoid the toddler inquisition, I bid you all adieu. I wish you all silence and a full night’s sleep!

Be Well!

Don’t Miss Lucky Jeans Twice Annual 50% Off Sale!

Hey readers! Just yesterday I stopped by the Lucky Brand store to use my gift certificate from my all too generous Mother-in-law. I have to say that despite always loving their jeans and clothing, they have some stuff that is beyond what I was expecting this year, and much of it is HALF-PRICE right now! Click the link below and grab some half-price digs before it’s too late.

I picked up a pair of their 181 style jeans…very cool, and they fit great! Click the image to go directly to the 181 product page.

Rooted in rock ‘n’ roll with a signature sense of humor, Lucky Brand Jeans stands for independent thinking, individual style & feeling authentic as love. Creators Gene Montesano & Barry Perlman are renowned for their great-fitting, vintage-inspired jeans.

Lucky Brand Jeans designs and produces denim, sportswear, knits, wovens, outerwear, T-shirts and activewear for Men, Women & Kids. Additional licensed products include swimwear and accessories.

Don’t Miss Lucky Brand Twice Yearly Sale – 50% Off Select Items

I do receive a commission for each sale made through my links, so I do appreciate your use of links on Not Just Another Dad to purchase from Lucky Brand among my handful of other terrific retailers.

Be Well!

Add to FacebookAdd to DiggAdd to Del.icio.usAdd to StumbleuponAdd to RedditAdd to BlinklistAdd to TwitterAdd to TechnoratiAdd to Yahoo BuzzAdd to Newsvine

Common Sin With Uncommon Impact

I remember well the first time I actually watched Tiger Woods play golf. It was the final round of the 1996 U.S. Amateur Championship, and I tuned in late with Tiger down 2 holes and only 3 to play. He had been down five with nine to play, and was in the midst of what would become an historic comeback when he holed out a short birdie putt on the final hole to force a playoff. He then won on the second playoff hole for his record third consecutive U.S. Amateur Championship. He would go on to turn pro later that summer, winning the Masters for his first major victory the very next spring. Since that amazing start I have enjoyed and been amazed by Tiger’s ability to do under extreme pressure what very few people have been able to do at all. Almost every time I have watched Tiger play a “have-to-win” hole or stroke a “must-make” putt, he has succeeded. His success pleased me greatly as a sports fan, and specifically as a fan of golf.

I also vaguely remember first hearing about his relationship with Elin Nordegren. I believe that one of my friends sent me an e-mail, or forwarded a link to an article about it. The basic premise was, of course, that Tiger had met and started dating an “attractive” Swedish model. Upon reading further, I discovered that, in addition to some modeling, she was also a nanny for PGA Tour veteran Jesper Parnevik who was friendly with Tiger and introduced the couple. An apparent whirlwind romance, and a couple children later, all seemed simply peachy for Tiger and Elin. I distinctly remember seeing the Woods’ now famous family photo early in 2009, and saying to my wife, Kerry, “Wow! Tiger has really built himself a perfect life, huh?” I’m sure that I am not the only one who made such a soon-to-be-off-the-mark comment upon viewing that wonderful image.

Wait a minute here! You are probably now asking yourself, doesn’t this guy have a golf blog that would be better suited for this Tiger Woods nonsense? Yes, it would, if I were going to speak of golf, and indeed I have written a couple of times on the subject on my golf blog here. This piece, however, is not about golf per se, but rather the way that Tiger has become the latest of famous fathers to be hammered by our society for his failings as a faithful husband and responsible dad.

It is interesting to me how different people value vices and virtues differently, and indeed how they project those values upon others, quite often others with whom they have never become acquainted. It is hard to defend Tiger when discussing what he has done off the course, and I am not interested in trying. Quite to the contrary, I find his behaviors to be in unfathomably poor taste, socially retarded, and downright cruel to those who love him most, i.e. Elin and her two beautiful children.

Despite all that, many have reacted against the media who found the slight tear in the fabric of perfection that Tiger had draped over his personal life and tore it to shreds, revealing significantly more than perhaps anyone expected to find. While I also find much of what “our” media does these days to be predatory and inappropriate, they are merely reflecting what the masses want to know. It is easier than ever to know what subject matter the world wants to talk about with Google and other search engines compiling our curiosities millions of times over and making the knowledge available to anyone interested. People are clearly interested in seeing this man’s life exposed for all the bad it could possibly harbor, but to what end?

Tiger is going to come back to golf. He may or may not have reconciled with Elin by then, and may or may not have become a better husband, father, and person that he said he wants to be. He may or may not still have the drive to not just win, but bury his competitors, yet it remains highly likely that he will ultimately break Jack Nicklaus’ record of 18 Majors.

I don’t care!

Really, I don’t. Though I was a fan, upon introspection I never really rooted for Tiger, but rather watched in awe as he accomplished things on the course that I can barely even dream of doing myself. Sure, there were times when I rooted for Tiger over another competitor as I did during that Masters victory in 1997, or when he faced off with an insipid and annoying Sergio Garcia in the 1999 PGA Championship. Recently, however, I have found several others who have captured my attention, and who I have rooted for over Tiger. Whether it is Phil Mickelson, Geoff Ogilvy, Anthony Kim, or that cool new kid on the block, Rory McIlroy, they all portray a humanity and openness that Tiger mostly eliminated from his on-air persona at least a decade ago.

So, when Tiger returns, yes, I am still going to watch him play, and I am still going to be in awe of what he accomplishes, but rooting for him will be no more or less a part of it for me than it was before. The reason for this is pretty simple actually. I don’t in any way model myself after Tiger Woods…not even on the golf course! First, I know I will never hit a ball like he does, no matter how much I practice, it will not happen…ever. Second, I do not like Nike products…I didn’t buy them before this incident, and will not buy them now. This holds true for all other products Tiger endorses save for Gatorade which I drank routinely before even Tiger graduated high school. Finally, I never, ever have or will think Tiger would excel over me at being a husband or father.

So, let me ask you, how do you feel about Tiger Woods? Have you judged him for what we have learned about his marital infidelities? Are there others you have known personally who have done something similar? Does the number of women that Tiger has been linked to thus far make it any worse than if it had been just one? Again, it doesn’t matter what we all think, it only matters what Tiger thinks…and to Tiger, hopefully it matters what Elin and his two children will think. Tiger committed no sin against you, only himself, and his family, and he is now having to answer to them.

What of other “sinners”?

Pete Rose holds the record in baseball for most career hits with 4,256, yet he will likely never enter baseball’s Hall of Fame. He bet on baseball, if you hadn’t already heard, and even bet on his own team (to win, according to Mr. Rose). He violated one of baseball’s sacred rules, and will therefore not be allowed the honor of being one of their all-time greats on the field. Tiger will not only be enshrined in golf’s Hall of Fame the day he hangs up the spikes, but was just named the PGA Player of the Year right in the midst of this scandal. Is betting on baseball games a more undesirable transgression than cheating on your wife? Of course not, but professionally there is no contest because of the relevance of the “crime”.

Bill Clinton cheated on his wife while holding the highest political office in the United States of America, and arguably the world. He was asked about it by a judge during his deposition in the Kenneth Starr led Whitewater investigation and dodged the question, only to lie about his affair in public. Despite the question and the affair being completely irrelevant to the investigation, Clinton was impeached by the House of Representatives, becoming only the second U.S. president to be impeached, though he was later acquitted by the Senate. One of the articles of impeachment, and in my opinion, the most relevant, was “abuse of power”, which Clinton clearly did. But did he? Did Clinton really do anything that many others have done despite holding no power? I will leave it for you to decide, but the end result was a completed Clinton presidency, a public humiliation, followed by the continued ability to make loads of money making appearances and speeches across the world to this day. The Clintons are still married, though the grounds of which will only be fully known by Bill and Hillary.

Others who have publicly cheated, yet manage to maintain a very comfortable lifestyle and fan following include Michael Jordan, Magic Johnson, Hugh Grant, Charlie Sheen, and David Letterman. Did they “abuse their power”? Certainly they did (well, maybe not Mr. Grant), but somehow many millions have found it in their hearts to forgive these philanderers, so why not Tiger too?

When asked, I will always answer that I am not a religious man, but I am a spiritual one. I believe in a personal moral and ethical code, many facets of which should be shared by all civilized and sane folks. I believe that the act itself is not a violation of that code, but rather the effect that said act may have, i.e. the pain it will likely cause others. I think that a code of statutory laws is also required for a society to run itself with consistency, though I believe those laws require fair judgment to determine whether the circumstances surrounding the violation of the letter of the law deem the violation to be “understandable” and “forgivable”. We have legislators, police officers, judges and courts in America to perform the latter service, but the former must be handled by ourselves.

Some of these codes cross over between moral/ethical and statutory. Examples of those would include murder, theft, and assault. Tiger Woods committed a violation of statutory law when he drove over that fire hydrant, and he paid his debt to society for that. He also committed many acts many of us would deem a violation of our moral code, but it is only Tiger who can say if he violated his moral code, and unless we are willing to create a statutory law against extramarital affairs (which we should not!), it is not our responsibility to judge Tiger, but rather hope that he did knowingly violate his own moral code, and will ask forgiveness from himself, and from the rest of the people in his life he hurt.

I know the decision that I have made regarding this subject, and I hope that most or all of you would agree. We need to cease our support for the media gossip machine, and leave these “celebrities” to their business. If a childish actor decides to get liquored up and plows his Hummer into a palm tree, let’s let the police handle it, and not concern ourselves with why it happened and what the results were by purchasing issues of Us, People, and National Enquirer. Stop watching those god-awful television programs aired just before prime time, the worst of which might be TMZ, designed only to openly gossip about celebrities. Finally, we must end our need to be “up” on all the latest gossip by visiting celebrity gossip blogs and sites online. Only when we stop will the media stop, and we can get back to being interested in making ourselves better people too.

Be Well!

Add to FacebookAdd to DiggAdd to Del.icio.usAdd to StumbleuponAdd to RedditAdd to BlinklistAdd to TwitterAdd to TechnoratiAdd to Yahoo BuzzAdd to Newsvine

More Savings Codes for Lucky Brand Jeans

Hello all,

A few more offers from Lucky Brand have come my way, so if you are still looking for gifts, please take a look!

Rooted in rock ‘n’ roll with a signature sense of humor, Lucky Brand Jeans stands for independent thinking, individual style & feeling authentic as love. Creators Gene Montesano & Barry Perlman are renowned for their great-fitting, vintage-inspired jeans.

Lucky Brand Jeans designs and produces denim, sportswear, knits, wovens, outerwear, T-shirts and activewear for Men, Women & Kids. Additional licensed products include swimwear and accessories.

30% Off Your Purchase.Enter code: 9DECAF at checkout

$20 off purchases of $100 or more at Lucky Brand. Enter Code 9DECFCBK. Valid 12-14-2009 through 12-24-2009

Free Shipping with $75 Purchase. Expires 12-31. 9WEARNOW

Happy Holiday Shopping & Be Well!

Add to FacebookAdd to DiggAdd to Del.icio.usAdd to StumbleuponAdd to RedditAdd to BlinklistAdd to TwitterAdd to TechnoratiAdd to Yahoo BuzzAdd to Newsvine

More 30% Savings at Lucky Brand Jeans

Hey all…due to high demand on the Black Friday sale, Lucky Brand is offering 30% savings on almost everything in their store for a limited time. Use the link below to shop and don’t forget to use the coupon code 9DECAF at checkout to get your savings.

30% Off at Lucky Brand. Enter code: 9DECAF

I hope the holiday shopping is going well for all of you!

Be Well!

Add to FacebookAdd to DiggAdd to Del.icio.usAdd to StumbleuponAdd to RedditAdd to BlinklistAdd to TwitterAdd to TechnoratiAdd to Yahoo BuzzAdd to Newsvine

RARE! Thanksgiving Day Sale at Lucky Brand Jeans!

Hey NJAD readers! I wouldn’t normally create a post just to sell something, but this is an uncommon day for discounts. Aside from all the other Black Friday and Cyber Monday offers I will feature on my blog this weekend, Lucky Brand Jeans is offering 30% off their products ON THANKSGIVING DAY! The sale does exclude sale, clearance, and gift cards, but they still have lots of great stuff to offer for gifts, or yourself. Just click the link below.

30% Off Thanksgiving Day Only at Lucky Brand (excludes Gift Cards, Sale & Clearance).

I also wouldn’t promote something that I didn’t use and enjoy myself. Lucky Jeans are possibly the most comfortable jeans I have ever worn…and I wear jeans a lot (even to the occasional wedding). They also have some pretty funky stuff for the kids, like this pair of pants my son rocked on his 1st birthday…

Xavier wearing Lucky Brand pants on his 1st birthday

Xavier wearing Lucky Brand pants on his 1st birthday

Happy Thanksgiving!

Add to FacebookAdd to DiggAdd to Del.icio.usAdd to StumbleuponAdd to RedditAdd to BlinklistAdd to TwitterAdd to TechnoratiAdd to Yahoo BuzzAdd to Newsvine

This Dad’s Blog Has A New Address!

To all of you readers of Just Another Dad, we have moved! Finally sold the condo?! I wish that were the case, but in actuality, only the blog has moved. What once was justanotherdad.wordpress.com is now http://notjustanotherdad.com. If you enter the old domain, you will still get to the new site, but if you have bookmarked the site, please take a second to update the link with the new URL.

You will quickly notice that the look and feel of the site has changed as well. I would love your feedback on this as it can be easily changed again. I chose it because it conveys a sense of adventure that suggests stories from books my own Dad would read to me as a child.

As always, please take note of the affiliate partnerships I have established in the right column, and take a moment to click through and browse their sites, buying at will.

Thanks so much for following along, I hope it continues to be as much fun to read and contribute as it has been for me to write.

Be Well!

Pediatrician's Advice About H1N1 – Follow-up

Several weeks ago, I posted a letter from our pediatric office regarding the H1N1 virus, the hysteria surrounding it, and some advice about the vaccine. It got a lot of hits, so I thought I would post the follow-up letter that we received about a week and a half ago for your perusal. Hopefully, this will continue to take some of the edge off this relatively mild virus. As with the first time, the italics represent a direct quote from the letter written by Diane Holmes, M.D. and Kenneth Polin, M.D.

We are now into the seventh month of this outbreak, and fortunately, the overall severity of this infection has not increased.  The media reports the most severely affected patients without regard to the significant numbers who are not very ill and recover easily.  According to Center for Disease Control estimates, almost 6 million individuals have been infected, generating approximately 20,000 hospitalizations.  By those statistics, an individual with H1N1 disease has less than a 0.3% chance of even being sick enough to be hospitalized.  Please try not to fall prey to the media-based hysteria.  They are only giving the part of the story that draws viewers.

As we talk with our pediatrician friends in the area, we are all frustrated both with the lack of vaccine and the limitations of administration.  The entire H1N1 vaccine supply in the US is channeled through the federal government and subsequently through state and then local health departments.

Unfortunately, their efficiency is not always up to the standards we would like.   With all our staff working as hard as possible and with some of our nurses and doctors putting in extra time to just vaccinate, we have been able to give slightly more than 2,000 doses of the vaccine so far.  We understand your frustration if your child is not yet in that group.

Please understand that all pediatric patients are now considered in the priority group for the vaccine.  Even if we had enough vaccine for everyone (and we certainly do not) and our personnel did nothing but vaccinate all day, every day, it would still take more than 12 days to give the vaccine to everyone who wants it.  We absolutely want to vaccinate as many children as possible, but we need to also continue seeing sick children and give other essential vaccines.  One additional avenue to obtain the vaccine for your child is to bring him/her along with your other child’s scheduled visit.  We are happy to accommodate you if the proper vaccine is available that day.  Just ask the secretary to pull out the charts for the other child(ren), too, when you check in.

Another area of frustration is in trying to make practice adjustments keep in compliance with changing CDC guidelines.  This might result in inconsistent information at times being given to you by our staff.  We can only continue to try to do our best.

Please know that we take all pediatric illness very seriously.  Symptoms of flu (cough, congestion, fever, muscle aches, sore throat) do not routinely need to be seen in the office or the Emergency Department.  If at any point, however, you have concerns about your child’s illness (especially any fever lasting longer than 72 hours, any breathing compromise, child looking progressively sicker, child unable to drink) you should have your child seen. One frequently asked question is “What is the fever number that we should worry about?”  In children over 6 months of age, there is no “worry number.”  Always evaluate your child’s situation in context and trust your parental judgement.  A child with a 104 fever who is droopy but alert, breathing easily and able to drink is much less concerning than the child whose fever is 101 but is not alert, has respiratory issues, doesn’t have good color or is getting dehydrated.

Many thanks to those of you who have expressed appreciation to our office staff and our nurses recently for all their hard work during this very stressful time.  Your kindness and understanding is truly appreciated.

As always, we are trying to be as responsive to your concerns as possible.  Together, we will get through this.

Be Well!

Add to FacebookAdd to DiggAdd to Del.icio.usAdd to StumbleuponAdd to RedditAdd to BlinklistAdd to TwitterAdd to TechnoratiAdd to Yahoo BuzzAdd to Newsvine

T.V. Or Not T.V. – That Is The Question

I love television! You love television too. C’mon, admit it, even if you think you spend too much time watching T.V., you love it. Television is an incredible invention and tool. It informs, entertains, passes the time, and creates loads of water cooler topics for us all to chat about while we aren’t watching T.V. Now, with the advent of first, cable programming, then satellite television, there are a seemingly endless supply of shows we can watch. Too many, in fact, for a single person to watch all of, so along came Picture-in-Picture, TiVo and DVRs, followed quickly by DVDs of television shows, webcasts, and iPod downloads. We watch comedies, drama, sports, documentaries, reality shows, then shows about reality shows, and awful “celebrity news” programs about the people on the shows about reality shows. Let me just sum this paragraph up by simply stating the following: TMZ? OMG!

I have also loved television for as long as I remember. I have very fond and vivid memories of watching “Sesame Street”, “Electric Company”, and “Zoom” on PBS back when I was four or five years old living on the north side of Chicago. I remember the intro music to the nightly news shows my dad watched religiously (and still does). I can still sing word-for-word the jingles for Empire Carpets, Aronson Furniture, and Townhouse T.V. and Appliances. I remember all those Saturday morning cartoons and watching sitcom after sitcom like “Welcome Back Kotter”, “Barney Miller”, and “Alice” after school every day. In recent years I was truly addicted to several shows including “Lost”, “Survivor”, “The Amazing Race”, and “CSI” (yes, the Vegas one – do the others even deserve the “CSI” name?). Finally, of course, I don’t let a Sunday go by without watching 6+ hours of NFL football, though I do try to get out of the house and be social for those.

Wow, sounds like I must have a rotted brain, obese body, high blood pressure, and a propensity for violent behavior, right? Nope. Aside from being a little softer around the middle, and perhaps a little less sharp than my interestingly television-free college years, I am a pretty healthy, happy, and good natured person with a good head on his shoulders, thank you. Does this mean that too much T.V. is in no way detrimental to human development? No way!

Many studies have been done that effectively demonstrate that excessive television viewing in early childhood leads to a higher risk of all the nastiness I listed above. Just to reinforce, that was obesity, high blood pressure, delayed or reduced capacity to learn reading and writing skills, and aggressive or violent behavior and mannerisms. I guess the key question is what constitutes “too much”? It appears as though the general consensus is that any television is worse than no television, but let’s be honest about the reality of a child growing up in America and never watching any television. From what I have read, it sounds like the scientific suggestion is that 4 hours or more daily is excessive, and progressively less than that is progressively better. So, now you know what to do with your children, just cut back that television time, right? Wrong.

Like almost everything else in life, that is simplifying the issue way too much. Let’s assume that children are going to watch television. In my case, the primary child watching television is my two and a half year old son, Xavier. Xavier likes a handful of television programs, and probably watches too much television. It is frustrating for both my wife and I as we would like to curtail his viewing habits more than we have, but between my money-making efforts and her caring for seven month old Hayden in addition to Xavier, television is a convenient distraction, and allows us to get the necessities done. You might think that makes us bad parents, and you have a right to your opinion, but there is more to it than that.

Here are some of the ways that we try to make the time he spends watching television effective, and hopefully less damaging to his development:

  • Avoid programming that includes commercials. Fortunately, we get the Disney Channel, Nickelodeon, and Noggin to complement our PBS channel. I know that Disney and PBS are commercial free, and I believe Noggin is as well. Commercials suck! They are well-produced and have a very definite objective to sell products and/or services to us. The benefit that they entertain us only makes their messages more powerful, and is in no way their primary objective. Children, toddlers in particular, can’t discern between commercials and regular programming, and can often immediately want the things they see on commercials. They can do the same with things they see on television programs, but generally the programs aren’t specifically trying to sell them something, so the impact is perhaps lessened.
  • Choose programming that encourages the viewers to be interactive, physically active, and thinking. Perhaps “Mickey Mouse Clubhouse” isn’t the greatest, but throughout that show, the characters ask questions directly to the “camera” and even pause so the child can respond. Mickey and his pals will also encourage the child to get up off his or her butt and march, dance, skip, and stretch. Other favorites of ours that at least try to be educational include “Word World” and “Sid the Science Kid”. I am not claiming that these shows will turn our young boy into a super-genius (his genes will do that), but they are relatively entertaining even for adults which helps us interact as well and ask him questions about what he watched, what he thought of it, and heap praise on him when he demonstrates having learned something during the show.
  • Get him actively playing and exploring outside the home for several hours each day, or inside if and outdoor excursion is either unmanageable or unaffordable. We utilize a local playground, the nearby train stations, and our very walkable urban neighborhood. Xavier has had the opportunity to explore some of the greatest museums our country has to offer, including the outstanding Children’s Museum on Navy Pier. FYI, if you live in Chicago, you can go to any local library and check out free passes to most of the city’s museums, pending their availability, of course.
  • Read to him every night before bed, and randomly throughout the day. During reading, it is important to keep the child engaged by asking questions about the story, what he thinks might happen next, what he would do in that situation, and other questions along those lines. We need to make more time to read to him, and encourage him to “read” alone as well.

With all that said, there are some weak points we need to correct, but struggle to balance. I have mentioned often in the past that Xavier loves trains. It is no surprise he would, they are big powerful machines that are ever present in our neighborhood as we live only blocks away from the two major commuter train stations in Chicago (Union Station and Ogilvie Transportation Center), and steps from the Green/Pink CTA elevated line (the “El”). Along with that love of trains comes a love for train videos and shows. Xavier will watch everything from “Thomas the Tank Engine”, to a DVD series appropriately title “I Love Toy Trains”, and a surprisingly gargantuan assortment of train videos available for viewing on YouTube.

While the train videos seem innocent, they have a few drawbacks that are causing us to become more strict about his time spent viewing them. First, while not commercials, they are selling us something…toy trains, imagine that! I have to admit that I have at times gotten swept into the collectible nature of the Thomas the Tank Engine characters, of which there are many more than you might imagine. We use the wooden variety (they also are available in die cast and a plastic motorized version), which cost anywhere from $10-$30 retail per character. The various buildings and accouterments are even more wallet-thinning ringing in for prices extending well into the $100+ range. Now that he has discovered actual “O” and “HO” scale toy trains I can only imagine how high the prices of his wish lists will climb.

These shows and videos can also be quite violent. Not in the shooting way that cop shows and war movies are, nor in the reality defying catastrophic injury manner of such cartoons as “Bugs Bunny” or “Tom and Jerry” are, but rather in the frequency and seriousness of the train derailments and other disasters that saturate the Thomas series. Even in the “I Love Toy Trains” series which features video of actual toy train layouts in various shops and basements, the “funny” moments involve trains crashing and derailing. I have no doubt in my mind that Xavier’s tendency to involve crashing in all aspects of his play come directly from our decision to introduce him to the “Thomas the Tank Engine” video series. Recently, I have found myself catching him in the midst of reenacting scenes from the videos, stopping him from completing the scene, and explaining that trains crashing is actually very far from funny, and that people get very hurt when train crashes happen (regardless of how incredibly powerful they are to watch).

So, I’m not so much looking for advice as much as sharing our experience with television, and wondering if others would be willing to share their challenges with this battle (and by battle, I men with the ubiquitousness of television more than the battle with the child wanting to watch it). This is something that is very difficult to avoid due to the demands on our time, and can’t be even close to unique to us.

I’d also love to know from the parents out there if and by how much having children has curtailed their own television watching habits. I have significantly reduced mine, and now will not even watch a single episode of a new show knowing my own propensity to becoming “hooked”. I still watch “Heroes”, will not miss “Lost”, and try to keep up with “The Amazing Race”. I still watch a lot of football on Sunday and most Monday Nights. I have lost touch with “How I Met Your Mother”, “Survivor”, and “The Big Bang Theory”. The only other show in the rotation is “The Biggest Loser” which, at two hours per episode is both way too long and easy to cut away from sporadically to get things done. Those people on that show are both inspirational and indicative of the epidemic of obesity in America, and it is something I like to keep up with.

Thank you, and Goodnight.

Add to FacebookAdd to DiggAdd to Del.icio.usAdd to StumbleuponAdd to RedditAdd to BlinklistAdd to TwitterAdd to TechnoratiAdd to Yahoo BuzzAdd to Newsvine